Goodbye Forever.




Crop Rotation

Think you understand crop rotation? I never did. Every teacher told about different crops to rotate when, and why. Cripes, make up my mind, will you! This recently found interview with Thomas Jefferson might shed some light.

The Art Of Telling Jokes – Do You Have It In You?

Making boring and insipid situations funny and lively comes easily to some people. It is as if they are born with an in-born talent to make people laugh and lighten dreary and lackluster atmosphere. Are you blessed with such a talent? Do you tend to crack jokes at the drop of a hat? Are you the most sought-after guy in the gang? Are your heaven and hell jokes the life of parties? Undoubtedly, you are a rare breed because the ability to make people laugh and cheer them up in boring times is an extraordinary ability that only a select few have.

Q & A With Time

A brief Q&A session with ‘Time’. The first ever interaction with time itself and comprehending some unexplained aspects of life.

George Seeks The Help Of A Grumpy Green

George had discovered a previously unknown monster in Lake Windermere and it was being studied by Dr Bront of the Natural History Museum. The Windermere Winnie had been moved to King Freddie’s menagerie at Windsor for the duration of the research programme. ‘I’m worried about one thing,’ said Dr Bront. ‘We only have this one male specimen. Without a female, not only is our study incomplete but there’s a likelihood of the species becoming extinct.’

A World Of Monsters For Children’s Stories

Legends of fire-breathing monsters are hundreds, maybe thousands, of years old, perhaps originating in ancient China where dragons are still an essential element in popular culture. The theme is so rich that it seems capable of sustaining any number of makeovers as successive generations of authors recreate it in their own manner. In the present case, the need was to produce tales to entertain and encourage boys at boarding school in England in the 1970s. The scenario manifested a Europe in the Middle Ages that was home to a variety of fire-breathing monsters, most associated with a specific geographical area, and presenting a range of challenges to the competing monarchies.

George And A Bag Of Gold Coins

George, Patron Saint and Minister for the Environment, had been accused of not accounting for a bag of gold coins which he had been given by the secret service to take to Scotland to buy a new sporran for King Duncan. He sent a pmail to Prime Minister Merlin the Whirlin to ask for Peter Paye of His Majesty’s Revenue and Customs to come down to Gloucestershire to investigate what had happened to the money. Peter was happy to help his old friend and hurried down to George’s castle to be briefed by George and his man, Jack.

Persuading King Freddie To Sign A Treaty With Ireland

King Freddie was far from happy, all three of his Irish whatsits were ailing. His menagerie manager, Barney Benn, stood before him quaking at the possibility of instant dismissal or, at least, a dunking in the moat. ‘How has this happened?’ demanded the king. ‘It has been coming a long time,’ spluttered the distraught monster minder, ‘at first, the animals that George brought here were very healthy but gradually they seem to have got weaker and weaker.’

Recipe For The Russian Soul

While rehearsing for our upcoming show, Russian director Aleksey Burago and I had a heated discussion about the Russian Soul–namely, the lack of it in Hollywood’s treatment of Russian literature. “No! It’s all wrong! They do not understand the characters’ mentality! It’s all room temperature! With the exception of one or two actors, none of them found the irrational, passionate, obsessive creatures only Russia is capable of producing!”

Backyard Squirrel Adventures

With plenty of trees in the backyard, we enjoy watching the squirrels. They are a tenacious bunch of animals full of antics and fun. Here’s a few adventures we saw first hand.

Problems With King Freddie’s Wooden Ships

The First Sea Lord, Admiral Sir Salty Biscuit, had reported to King Freddie that he was having problems building new warships because there was insufficient properly seasoned timber. Crafty Carlos, King of Spain, had been building ships faster than England for several years and now posed a real threat. In their attempt to catch up, the English had been forced to use wood before it was ready, and ships were being lost through warping of their timbers. King Freddie called Prime Minister, Merlin the Whirlin, and told him to investigate the problem and find a solution.

Did I Ever Tell You About Our Chipmunks’ Dastardly Deeds?

Chipmunks are adorable little creatures. I like to see them scurrying around the edge of our backyard. They are fun to watch from our kitchen window. Here are just a few amusing things about the chipmunks in our backyard.

King Freddie Wants A Development Project

The big question on Freddie’s feeble mind was how to further increase the nation’s wealth. He knew that eventually he would probably have to consult Prime Minister Merlin, but first he would see if any of his other advisers could make a useful suggestion. So he called a round-table conference and invited the former patron saint, Cuthbert, now Minister for Subsidence, Admiral Sir Salty Biscuit, Max Grabber, Head of Revenue and Customs, and Archibald Winky-Green, Coach to the National Tiddlywinks Team. Freddie chaired the meeting in his throne room and tried to inspire his companions with a long, rousing, kingly speech, recalling his ancestor, King Arthur and the Knights of the roundtable.

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